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Author Topic: Mario D20  (Read 3417 times)

« on: August 10, 2002, 03:31:24 PM »
Welcome to the Mario D20 system!

If I can get enough players who know the D20 rules or can pick up fast then we should have something!

All dice rolls are done by me!

Ill do it with just one player if it has to be.

-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-
-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-

« Reply #1 on: August 10, 2002, 03:41:27 PM »
I'll join, I wanna be Wario. HEZZ TOTALLYZZZ THE j0000ZZZZZ!!!!!1!!!!111!1 Can I have a sword and armor and a helmet and ***** armor (I don't know what its called) and gloves and a sheild!!!1

THISZZZ IZZZ HOWZZZ PREJUDIEZZZ RUINZZZ COMMUNICATIONZZZ!!!11!!!1 EVERYONEZZZ HAZZZ AZZZ RIGHTZZZ TOZZZ THEZZZZ ZZZZZZ''SZZZZZZZ!!!!1!!!!1
THISZZZ IZZZ HOWZZZ PREJUDIEZZZ RUINZZZ COMMUNICATIONZZZ!!!11!!!1 EVERYONEZZZ HAZZZ AZZZ RIGHTZZZ TOZZZ THEZZZZ ZZZZZZ''SZZZZZZZ!!!!1!!!!1

« Reply #2 on: August 10, 2002, 03:44:33 PM »
you sure can...

Well your enough to play I suppose, Ill e-mail you some ground rules then we can begin.




Start:



You start in a bushel of hay atop a large hay cart bound for the castle.

This is your chance! Everything you have been waiting for all these years! You can finally destroy all those nausating doo-gooders.

The hay cart turns the bend and clops right into the castle, past all the fortifications which hindired you before.

The hay cart stops in the square and you can hear people talking...what do you do?"

-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-
-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-

« Reply #3 on: August 10, 2002, 03:52:11 PM »
dude, you're totally the FUGGINZZZZ BIZNATCHZZZ!!!!1 THISZZ WILLZZZ BEZZZ SOZZZ BADASSERYZZZZ!!!!!1!!! Okay, I sent you the stuff over e-mail. I made Wario a dwarf, it seemed fitting, and I'll sneak up on the people and listen to them.

THISZZZ IZZZ HOWZZZ PREJUDIEZZZ RUINZZZ COMMUNICATIONZZZ!!!11!!!1 EVERYONEZZZ HAZZZ AZZZ RIGHTZZZ TOZZZ THEZZZZ ZZZZZZ''SZZZZZZZ!!!!1!!!!1
THISZZZ IZZZ HOWZZZ PREJUDIEZZZ RUINZZZ COMMUNICATIONZZZ!!!11!!!1 EVERYONEZZZ HAZZZ AZZZ RIGHTZZZ TOZZZ THEZZZZ ZZZZZZ''SZZZZZZZ!!!!1!!!!1

« Reply #4 on: August 10, 2002, 04:18:08 PM »
Ok I got your info, whats up with the z's? Oh well I guess its the "BZZ" bit.

Well I recommend you replace your normal Masterwork Great Axe with the Great Axe of Smiting. Rembember you can spend upwards of 2000 gp on equiptment and since thats the only weapon you perchised I recommend it.

---------------------------------




The driver is talking to a guard about where to put the hay. He mentions something about the royal stables. As the coach pulls away you hop back inside. Soon the driver pulls up to the stable and gets out.

He yanks off a pitch fork off the side of the wagon and walks around tword the back...

-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-
-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-

« Reply #5 on: August 10, 2002, 04:33:57 PM »
Okay, I'm gonna' hop out and CHOPZZZ THEZZZ FUZKERZZZZ BALLZZZZ OFFZZZ!!!1  BYEZZ THEZZ WAYZZZ,, IZZZ UZEZZZZ THE ZZZ'SZZZ WHENZZZ IZZZ GETZZZ EXCITEDZZZ BECAUSEZZ LOTSZZZ OFZZ MORONZZZZ ONZZ THEZZZ INTERNETZZ DOEZZZ THATZZZ!!!!!1!!!!

THISZZZ IZZZ HOWZZZ PREJUDIEZZZ RUINZZZ COMMUNICATIONZZZ!!!11!!!1 EVERYONEZZZ HAZZZ AZZZ RIGHTZZZ TOZZZ THEZZZZ ZZZZZZ''SZZZZZZZ!!!!1!!!!1
THISZZZ IZZZ HOWZZZ PREJUDIEZZZ RUINZZZ COMMUNICATIONZZZ!!!11!!!1 EVERYONEZZZ HAZZZ AZZZ RIGHTZZZ TOZZZ THEZZZZ ZZZZZZ''SZZZZZZZ!!!!1!!!!1

« Reply #6 on: August 10, 2002, 04:43:33 PM »
Ok you hop off the truck, its a surprise bonous (+4) on top of your greataxes +1...

Add that on top of your already +4 melee attack and you get +9...you roll a 13, his AC is 10... more than enough....

Even with your -4 penality of "called shot" which you aimed for his genitals. You still hit square on. Pearcing his cloth with your massive axe.


:: Wario hops off the wagon screaming and swings his axe. He lops the poor mans balls right off and he takes 1 damage...screaming and on the ground. A turn later you do a finishing blow, killing him.

Your sure the guards heard because you hear shouting and people coming at you.

Behind you are the royal stables and to your left (west) is a door to the main keep of the castle. ::

-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-
-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-

« Reply #7 on: August 10, 2002, 04:44:05 PM »
this is cool, its like a chat...Ill try to stay on as long as possibal.

-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-
-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-

« Reply #8 on: August 10, 2002, 05:49:17 PM »
Okay, I want to go into the castle to look for treasures, cause' treasures are good. Is there anybody in the way?


THISZZZ IZZZ HOWZZZ PREJUDIEZZZ RUINZZZ COMMUNICATIONZZZ!!!11!!!1 EVERYONEZZZ HAZZZ AZZZ RIGHTZZZ TOZZZ THEZZZZ ZZZZZZ''SZZZZZZZ!!!!1!!!!1
THISZZZ IZZZ HOWZZZ PREJUDIEZZZ RUINZZZ COMMUNICATIONZZZ!!!11!!!1 EVERYONEZZZ HAZZZ AZZZ RIGHTZZZ TOZZZ THEZZZZ ZZZZZZ''SZZZZZZZ!!!!1!!!!1

« Reply #9 on: August 10, 2002, 05:56:11 PM »
You look around finding no one in your way. You rush into the castle and find a set of steps leading upward.

You quickly slam the door and lock it shut then run up the stairs quickly.

At the top you stop at a door, there is moaning inside. You quickly break open the door only to find Mario and Peach doing...er...stuff.

Enraged you lift your axe.

-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-
-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-

« Reply #10 on: August 10, 2002, 06:03:03 PM »
Wherezz arez you? Forget it, I'll play with myself:

Wario runs up to the inner chambers of the castle, owned and proprieted by The Mushroom kingdoms most famous hero, Mario! Now is Wario's chance for the revenge he's longed for after all these years! AS Wario ran up the torchlit spire to the main tower as fast as his tiny legs could carry him, all he could think about would be the sweet sweet revenge he would have after he cut Mario's ridiculous Wap-deygo mousthace off. At long last, he came upon a door. Not even bother to try the doorknob or knock or give any warning, Wario destroys the door with his axe. Mario and Peach were within, surprised by Wario's sudden entrance. They would've been surprised any way of course, but it was particularly surprisng since they were about to start being intimate...
THISZZZ IZZZ HOWZZZ PREJUDIEZZZ RUINZZZ COMMUNICATIONZZZ!!!11!!!1 EVERYONEZZZ HAZZZ AZZZ RIGHTZZZ TOZZZ THEZZZZ ZZZZZZ''SZZZZZZZ!!!!1!!!!1

« Reply #11 on: August 10, 2002, 06:11:04 PM »
Wario stared mockingly at them, naked and vulnerable. The irony made Wario laugh aloud. Not only was Mario going to meet his end at the hands of his mirror opposite, he would be nude and defensless the entire time. And then not only would the castle and Mario's treasures be his, but Wario would have the pleasure of slaughtering him and the princess, nude and...inviting. Wario had never been gay, but he couldn't help but be strangely arroused at Mario's stangely proportioned nude body. His fat italian manhood beckoned to Wario, hypnotizing him. Wario was speechless at his newfound desires, and after an awkward silence Mario noticed the staring. "Hey Wario, are you gonna' kill me or just ogle me all day, [bundle of sticks]?" This was too much for Wario. He had a mission, and he wouldn't let a few homo***ual fanatasies end his oppurtunity. He pounced upon the bed. After swiflty punching Mario in the temples and off the bed, he lept upon Princess Peach. Mario was in too much pain to move or speak, and could only stare on helplessly as Wario had his way with Peach. Wario, as though he had practiced for years, tore away his violet overalls in one well timed pull, revealing a phallus to rival Mario's.
THISZZZ IZZZ HOWZZZ PREJUDIEZZZ RUINZZZ COMMUNICATIONZZZ!!!11!!!1 EVERYONEZZZ HAZZZ AZZZ RIGHTZZZ TOZZZ THEZZZZ ZZZZZZ''SZZZZZZZ!!!!1!!!!1

« Reply #12 on: August 10, 2002, 06:13:30 PM »
mario loses his dex modifier to his AC making it 0.

Peach has a DC4 of strength, which you pass with only your modifier(!)

Your free to ravage.

-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-
-=Looking For Peace? I DIDN''''T THINK SO!=-

« Reply #13 on: August 10, 2002, 06:19:10 PM »
He was already turgid from his encounter with Mario's brilliant soldier, and lept upon Peach with all the fury he had felt at Mario's hands all these years. He turned her over and stared down greedily at her backside, knowing that within moments it would be all his, nothing capable of seperating them. He crawled backwards a few inches, only to thrust forward with a violence he had never expirienced before. He fell upon her, ferociously humping as though his life depended upon it, as thought it was the reason he was placed on this earth. As we all know, Wario is a warped version of Mario, so certain aspects of Wario were twisted to represent this (Mousthache, shoes). This included his *****, which was corkscrew shaped to prolong penetration during ejaculation. Wario found himself shreiking "Oh this is it! This is greater than a 1,00 treasure chests!" He'd never felt so alive, and Peaches screams of abject terror only spurred him on more ferociously. As hard as he tried, he could only hold back for a few moments longer, until finally it all came rushing out in a purple river of streaming, sticky rage that finally buried his year-long rivalry with Mario. He had killied Peach in the proces, and a few more blows to the head finished Mario. Now that all witnesses had been eliminated, Wario turned his eyes upon Mario...
THISZZZ IZZZ HOWZZZ PREJUDIEZZZ RUINZZZ COMMUNICATIONZZZ!!!11!!!1 EVERYONEZZZ HAZZZ AZZZ RIGHTZZZ TOZZZ THEZZZZ ZZZZZZ''SZZZZZZZ!!!!1!!!!1

« Reply #14 on: August 10, 2002, 06:22:21 PM »
Wario picked up Mario's body and stuffed it itno his overalls. Wario escaped pantsless and carrying Mario's body with him for with him. He would have it preserved, and forever it would be his "multi-functional" trophy. Now then, is there anyone preventing me from leaving the castle?

THISZZZ IZZZ HOWZZZ PREJUDIEZZZ RUINZZZ COMMUNICATIONZZZ!!!11!!!1 EVERYONEZZZ HAZZZ AZZZ RIGHTZZZ TOZZZ THEZZZZ ZZZZZZ''SZZZZZZZ!!!!1!!!!1
THISZZZ IZZZ HOWZZZ PREJUDIEZZZ RUINZZZ COMMUNICATIONZZZ!!!11!!!1 EVERYONEZZZ HAZZZ AZZZ RIGHTZZZ TOZZZ THEZZZZ ZZZZZZ''SZZZZZZZ!!!!1!!!!1

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